Welcum 2 My Life

2005-07-28T21:30:00.000+08:00

Ive move my blog to shalihin1988.blogspot.com.. See u there..

Long long time..

2005-07-21T12:10:00.000+08:00

It's been a very long time since I blog. Hmm.. Y i even blog? To tell the whole human race?? What for? Haiz, but it's quite fun. Hmm, today is racial harmony. I'm wearing this Baju Kurung while writing this in school.

Istiqamah

2005-07-09T16:02:00.000+08:00

I've learnt a valuable lesson today. I've learnt to 'istiqamah'. It's the most important factor whom a person muz have in order to live on. I believe that everyone can make a change if they want to. Today went to band. Hmm... I think my life so boring. I must something to look forward to.

2005-07-07T22:02:00.000+08:00

Today had sectionals. Finished at around 6. Tomolo got band. Haix.. I hate having band on Friday. I got religious class after that. Muz be very tiring. Then the next day must attend band again... Juz my luck. Dun juz say but take action. Tt's going to be policy. Hmm.. Muz remind myself. I'm quite a forgtful person u no3. Tomolo I think softball again for P.E. It's okay i guess. Ya.. I need to do some configuration to my body n mind.. I'll start it veri soon. TT's all.. Nite

2005-07-06T21:39:00.000+08:00

Today marks the day of my o level oral. It went well i shud say. I said a lot of crap and I hope that I could achieve a distinction. Hmm... If not tomolo wanna see the war of the world but then. so suay.. I got band. Crapz.. Oh well.. I must endure for another month. Hope time fly super quickly.

School reopening

2005-06-26T22:54:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. A few hours from now marks the school reopening after the June holidays. I think that this June holidays is such a bore. Nothing is interesting. Well, see what happens in the future to come. I want to turn over this world I'm living in right now. I have not completed my homework yet. You know the usuals. From today onwards, I got to work extra hard as retake of science would be held. Ya.. I forgot about it. I got to study for a lot of tests but I can't recall what test. Im in a hot soup. K lah. Bye

Pool on9

2005-06-25T02:23:00.000+08:00

Basicallay today I did nothing again. Oh my Gosh, I have not completed my assignments yet. Darn it. N 2 days left before the school reopens. Not going band afterwards. It's such a bore. Going in band is a mistake in the first place. Shud haf followed my heart N join the cybernautics club. But, I only have a month to be tortued there. Finally, I'm going to take my 'o' levels pretty soon. Tomolo muz really chiong to finish up all my homework. Well, I watched a horrifying clip juz now. My heart suddenly felt very week after that. It has indeed taught me a valuable lesson. Correct yourself before you want to correct others. I also leaned that the media play a huge pat in toying with our heads. Many a times things in the media are not what is actually happening. Therefore I want to advise all of as to not just listen to a side of the story. You must be wise to live in this terrible world.

Soccer

2005-06-23T21:43:00.000+08:00

Im feeling a little dizzy rite now. Muz be becoz of the hot sun. I followed my brother to play soccer with his friends. It was 0.k. I suckz coz I've stopped playing for years aleady. As I observed. The guys from my bro's class was tying all their might to be able to flirt or attract this girl called Amelie. She has a personality which show a lot of sympathy to others. She's ok. I think that's kind of touching. Tt's why, I want to instill this feeling. But according to situation that is. If I can do this, I would be able to touch people's heart. Hmm.. Then, everybody can be happy. TT's right. Before I die, I want to createan impact to the people so I'm appreciated in that sense. TT's all. Wasted another day today.

haha

2005-06-21T22:32:00.000+08:00

Y do we fall? We fall to learn how to pick ourselves back up. I muz pick up myself. What am I striving for now? I'm striving to be the gretest entrepreneur ever. I want to make a name for the Malay community. I will make the difference. From now on, I will be more dominant. Well, people might think of it as stuck-up but i will avoid being one. In achieving to do so, I have to face my 'o'level with great courage. I will be the man in charge of the soldiers. I will lead others as well as myself. I will be more determined than ever. I will focus on my 'o' so I can enter a good business school. I will achieve. Yosh!! That will be my ultimate for now. TT's all.

2005-06-20T13:31:00.000+08:00

Hello.. I'm here again. Finally decided that if I want to do sth. I got to do it right. This is the boring phase of life that I'm going through right now.. Everything is so still. Hmm.. What shud I do? Maybe i get to noe more ppl. TT shud drive the boringness away. Okiez.

2005-06-19T21:02:00.000+08:00

Life.. what is it? What does it mean? Find it out urself. Today, I sit at home doing nothing. Again...

Good afternoon!..

2005-06-16T13:01:00.000+08:00

Hello.. Blogging again. Today is a brand new day. Started doing nothing until now. I noe now that life is still long. Y hurry things? It's all fated. But we have to work hard to get what we want. If not, it's not meant to be. My life now is like lily on a stagnant water. Tranquil. Quiet. Well.. I got nothing much to share today. Bye2

Halor..

2005-06-13T22:38:00.000+08:00

Long time no blog.. Haiz. Got some problem.. My router spoil making onli a single computer able to connect to the internet. So inconvenitent. Today, I ponteng my band tutorial. Planned it with Hafiz n Madi. Juz now, ultimate quarrel with sha2.. Got called 'musibat'.. Haha.. Not her fault. I started the fire. Well, I shud go on now knowing that everything is shattered after this battle of ours. Later on, I played pool with my sister. There, met Gadaffi I think. I wasn't sure. I think it's him. The game was okay. So, I won't be going for the game of pool this Friday with my classmatez. Juz want to remain in solitude so that there won't be any new outbreak of such. Thats all guyz. Tataz.

Limitation

2005-06-09T00:53:00.000+08:00

Today, went to skewl. Later self-study for mathematics. Hmm.. am I invited? It doesn't look like it. I dun wan to think too much. My creative brain will minapulate and make things worst. Do I have OCD? Oh my gosh!! I dun wan to have that. Dun haf lar.. I'm rather suffering from sleepiness right now. Can't think straight. I went home with Hafiz & Liyana from self-study for maths. Then, bumped into Ismadi. He asked me whether she my gf. I wonder.. Am I 2 close 2 her?? Hopefully not. I dun wan to be involved in such things. Personally, I haf no interest in such things no more. It's not like totally forget bout it but rather want to make sure to get the right person next. Get what I mean?? If u don't.. don't bother to find out.. Okiez.. nite3

blog transformation

2005-06-08T02:07:00.000+08:00

I finally decided to change the outlook of my blog.. With a little magic, it work wonders. I dunno. Is it good? If I gather more knowledge, I will upgrade ok. TT's all. I'm so tired. Nite all.

Hungry

2005-06-04T22:30:00.000+08:00

Feels like eating sth right this instance.. Suay. Tot got food @ hm. But, turned out otherwise. Nevermind lar.. I also must start dieting. Overweight already. Today I only waste time. I want to study. What is preventing me from doing so. Ahh!! Hehe.. Got food.. haha now i'm recharged. Maybe i shud off my hp.. N take no calls.. Study somewhere quiet. But where? ANy suggestions? Ok lar, I go now.. I wan to revise. Hopefully.

Yg sudah tu sudah

2005-06-03T15:51:00.000+08:00

Ye.. mmg betul.. Yg sudah tu sudah.. Tetapi patutkah aku hanya biarkan perkara ini seperti ini sahaja. Isi hati aku tidak tentu. Kdg2 rasenye menyampah. Kdg rasenye suka. Aku tidak tahu lagi apeyg aku mahu katakan. Aku patut lupakan sahaja semua itu. Seperti peribahasa yang berbunyi, buang yang keruh ambil yang jernih. Inilah yang patutku buat sementara waktu ini. Dalam kelas tadi, aku hanya mendiamkan diri. Aku seperti orang tak betul. Terencat otak. Baiklah. Sampai di sini sahaja aku di sini dengan selamatnya. Aku mempersembahkan lagu simple plan - untitled lyrics di bawah:
I open my eyes
I try to see but I’m blinded by the white light
I can’t remember how I can’t remember why
I’m lying here tonight

And I can’t stand the pain
And I can’t make it go away
No I can’t stand the pain

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

Everybody’s screaming
I try to make a sound but no one hears me
I’m slipping off the edge
I’m hanging by a thread
I wanna start this over again

So I try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
And I can’t explain what happened
And I can’t erase the things that I’ve done
No I can’t

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

Back from band camp

2005-06-02T21:47:00.000+08:00

Harlowz guyz.. Im back. The camp is ok i shud sae. Juz a calm one. Ismadi got sick even b4 he attended the camp. Hahakz. Went home today and didn't like all the dust from the renovation for my house. I feel like living in a 5-star hotel right this instance. Then, I did the boring this which i alwaes do. Which is pool. Waste money n all. I juz got the urge to take a ride on the rollercoaster. I want to feel the thrill. In Captain Cook, I said "Thank you Grace" to the waitress. I juz felt my heartbeat going in a faster rate from normal. It was like there was an adrenaline rush. Dunno why. At least, I dare. Well, its not a big a deal after all. Rite? Hmm.. got to go now. Till i c u again in the near future

YoSH!!!

2005-05-29T14:37:00.000+08:00

I muz do very well tomolo.. Yosh!!. I can do it. I believe in myself. Yosh..

Self-reflection

2005-05-26T22:14:00.000+08:00

Hmm... What Asriman said to me made sense. My defination of boring is because I'm no longer with. Well, looks like she far forgotten me and I'm still pondering this stupid matter. Well, Life has to go on. All THe best for my ML 'O'. Muz at least get an A2. Hopefully A1... Hope so. Ahh.. Shud listen to simple plan (untitled). Nice.. Sad song... Gd tune for me. Hahakz.. I'll be having band camp. I can either make it the best one or the most dreadful one. I think since it's my final year. I'll spend time knowing my members well. Hmm.. I'll do it. Yes!! I should move on with life now.. Gdby3

Long time nv blog

2005-05-25T20:52:00.000+08:00

Well, today, I'm going to talk about my life. My life is uncertain right now. Not clear. Very blurry. I hate being in the situation right now. In school, I'm Mr Lonely. Haiz.. Dunno hu to hang out with except for Hafiz. I dunno what sha2 feels about me n therefore I cannot conclude. 1 minute we know each other so well and the other minute, we're clueless. Dunno if she haf already found a guy. When playing pool yesterdae, she msged me to sae that im arrogant. Am I? Well, maybe. I dunno how to react in front of her. I no longer noe how or what to feel. Maybe it's better for me on my own. Maybe not.. I dunno.. Well, Life has lots of negative things. Rivalry here and there. And i'm juz there to see. Haiz. I wish I could do sth and make the change. As Humans, shouldn't we be 4giving? We should compromise and accomodate right? Tt's all folks.

2005-05-21T14:05:00.000+08:00

Hafiz, me , Faris n Madi

Wow

2005-05-13T18:44:00.000+08:00

WoW!! I didn't know I could talk crap without stopping during my english oral. I didn't where I got it from. Hehe. Well, me and shasha are on our own ways for now. I dunno what the future may hold. Juz now, Asriman treated me and syafiq LAN game because he got his pay liaoz.. Good 4 him. I dun quite like my hair.. I dunno how to comb. Muz learn it somewhere. I've decided to aim for nyp and take business course which is media & communication. It looks interesting to me. That way, I'll be more equipped with the publicity of my products. Still haven't decided on what to do sell yet. i hope ideas will come naturally to me. hehekz. I suspect that if I were to go in this line. There'll be lots and lots and challenges for me.Tt's what I like because I will be fulfilled by my own accomplishment.

Self-esteem

2005-05-12T16:30:00.000+08:00

Hello guyz!! Well, from now on. I'm not going to be the guy I used to be. The typical type. From today onwards, I declare myself the greatest guy in the world. I am not being self-centered or anything. I'm just praising myself. If not me, who else right? You can say whatever you want about me. I don't care. It's not what others think. It's what I think about myself. Syaheedah N me. I don't know anymore. I'll update about it some time later ya. Hahakz. I will succeed you guyz. Even if I fall, I'm going to pull myself up and pick up the pace. I hope to be ur good friend. Hehe. I know my blog is not well-known. Only so little people about it. The cycle will get bigger. I promise you.

Cold cold day.

2005-05-10T14:42:00.000+08:00

Juz it took my geo and maths paper 2. My maths really jialat ler.. haiz. But I think my geo i can make it though I didn't study. hehekz. Was very very cold till I lent windbreaker from hafiz. Juz now syaheedah's phone vibrated during geo. Was quite loud. All head around her turn to her. Tt's.. So boring

??

2005-05-09T17:34:00.000+08:00

When u think of someone? Does that someone think about you in return? I wonder. I know im going to blow 4 my humanities, maths and poa. No doubt about that. Have not started serious studying yet. Muzn't procrastinate 4 so long. Hafiz met up wif hajar. Haha!! Veri funni indeed. Coz of Ismadi that is. So now I know Ismadi crazy about motorcycle. It's fun to hang wif frenz sometimes. I dunno what's my life is going through right now. I sneeze quite a lot of times today. N my 'bantal busuk' makes it worst. Can smell it from 2 metres away. Hahakz. My 'bantal busuk' is where I can confide everything. Well, I think it'll need a bath. Okiez. Preparing mentally to die again 4 tomolo's paper. C u ard.

Darn

2005-05-05T20:56:00.000+08:00

I got the wrong form of word in my english compo. shat man.. Dun if i can clear this. It was all misunderstandings.

My Quote:
You're a winner if you think you're a winner,
You're a loser if you think you're a loser
Don't doubt yourself by thinking you're a loser,
Coz you will regret it in the future

So always think you're a winner,
And you will always remain a winner
It's not what other see inside you,
But you seeing yourself in the mirror

><

her departure

2005-04-30T21:19:00.000+08:00

Today, she left for kl. Kinda miss her althou it's not even a dae. Haiz.. Played bowling with my siblings. Lost. Pathetic me I should say. Me losing? It's kinda hard to believe rite? Haha. Interestingly, I saw the Lok Tang. Upon seeing the guys of somehow possesed. I wonder if I'm going to be a victim. Juz by looking from a far, it already gives the creeps out of me. Well, i reflected on life upon reading a blog. I realise that life is boring if it's juz still. It got to have ups and downs. Then it'll be interesting although u wud be broken hearted during ur downs.. well, wanna tell u guyz out there to chill. May it be good or bad. Haf fun ya'll.

Slackin'

2005-04-27T19:46:00.000+08:00

Recently, i've been slacking especially for my malay. Cannot slack already. Exams juz in 1 month time. If slack somemore... I will in in deep shit. Today, my bro got his car. His 'adorable' car. Hehekz. Can't reveal it. It's a secret. Went for a ride. It was normal. Nothing interesting. I'm not too crazy bout materials. Well, I feel contented with what I have though. Haiz.. I'm still quite lost of what I gonna in life. I hope to find it 1 dae.

Muz start panicking

2005-04-26T21:50:00.000+08:00

Nex week will be the mid-year. Arghh!! I must study hard!! I must shed some mass!! If I don't, I'm afraid that they will bend me to the worst that. I dun ever wan that to happen. I dun wan to be looked down. Like anybody realise my existence. Hahakz. The year i've been waiting for haf arrived. I must succeed no matter what juz like "burnout 3". Well.. I wan to design my own blog but.. I sucks.. Haha.. I dunno a shit bout java, css, d/v scripting. Guess shud start some reading up some books on it and make frequent visits to the library. I hope that anyone reading my blog wud succeed. Coz life is short. Take care allz..

pious

2005-04-05T00:55:00.000+08:00

Wah.. Long time i nv recite the Al-Quran. Now, want to start again. I hope it's not too late. Well, perhaps it's more fun to be more jovial and outgoing. Yah. It's much fun. But, muz be clever in time management. If not, suffer lar.. Well, my mid-year exams is starting next month. And I haf not even started a single revision. Oh my Gosh!! I should start now. I must work hard for my future. Yes. Counter what i'm afraid of. yes, motivate myself. All the way shalihin. u Can Do it. If ohters can do it. Y can't U?

long time

2005-04-03T14:22:00.000+08:00

Haven't been blogging for quite a while now. Because of some errors. Well, i decided to try to speak in with accent. Hehe. Very funny to talk that way because i'm not familiar with the style yet. This is my final run. Finally, sec 5. Would be graduating. I must dash all the way until i get what i want. At least a 15 for L1R5. I can do it. Yes. Give power my fellow friends. Haha. I will succeed. Yes. All the way!! Till death will I part with myself.

2005-03-27T14:48:00.000+08:00

Me, Asriman & Syaheedah

2005-03-27T10:46:00.000+08:00

Tak de kerja

slacking

2005-03-27T07:48:00.000+08:00

Recently, i've been slacking even though i had told myself to work hard. How should I live life? Hmm... I need pointers here. Maybe what I should do is to see the pinnacle of life. Then, aim it rite and work 4 it. I felt dissapointed when she asked me not to call. I wanted to talk to her badly. Then, I dreamt about her. I dreamt that she held my hand. It was great. But.. It was just a dream. Just a dream. Im living in a dream. My own world.. Pathetic me.

Kembali dari rahmatullah

2005-03-24T15:37:00.000+08:00

Wah.. it's been so long that i dunhaf internet. Now, it have revive. haha. Well, now, me juz wan to enjoy n haf fun. testing.

lpas hari raye haji

2005-01-24T00:34:00.000+08:00

Today supposed to go band tapi cikgu lepaskan. Dah tak leh tido malam skg sebab terlampau byk tido.

haha

2005-01-18T21:07:00.000+08:00

Wah.. I'm feeling much better now. Long time never blog. Well, I and her quite alrite already. Well, I noe tt i might not get her. But, as long as she's happy. So am i. Haiz. The basketball board pecah.. Haha. Kesian my sisters. I must moivate myself and be strong. I need to buck up. Tak sangka physics fail by a mark. How can I fail? Si Chan tak ajar betul2 kasi bistu kasi org test. Sengaja nak fail kan kita orang.

sianz

2005-01-13T12:20:00.000+08:00

Today i go skewl. Then got band. Go home wif shasha. The rest left me. HAiz.. I dun belong to anywhere. I used haf her but now i don't. She's everything to me. Herman, that is the boy tt she likes. I noe im no match for him. Im so down.

gym

2005-01-09T12:22:00.000+08:00

Todae, i went to gym with syafiq. B4 tt, eat n sleep a lot. Im feeling tired now. My arms are especially weak. @t nite, i got to finish my homework so i dun haf to worry to do it tomolo. Hope i can finish it. Then, i got to study physics tomolo for my oncoming test. This year is going to be fast. I must do my bez. In poa class, i feel so bored. Dunno y, juz dun like the 'fun' thing. Troublesome cum crappy. oh well, tt's all.

Ponteng band

2005-01-08T07:07:00.000+08:00

Todae i skipped my band practice. I wonder if nex week kena call out. Feeling quite tired especially at nite I got to go for religious class. I started talking to her already. After how many days of torment. I know I got to stay a distance since I'm unwanted. That's my life. Took height and weight during P.E. Wonder if I get to TAF club. Strangely enough the tall want to be shot. The short want to be tall. Funny isn't it. We are alwaes not contented with what we have. Some people are disabled. Thk god im normal. Nex week self-study start already. Sianz.. 3.30 then can go home. haiz.. I hope she would change. To be better. No wonder I felt tt she had bad influence. True enough. Pity her. Always don't want to hear me out. I, on the otherhand so stupid. Never gave up on her. I now prepared to take and to give her up. I'm stuck in the middle of the crossroads as usual. I want to be good in French Horn. But why am I not turning up for band? The band sux big time now. Got to pick up themselves. From today on, insyallah i wud never skip band. Hope so. If the lazy virus don't get in the way ar. So that's it.

2nd day of school

2005-01-05T12:27:00.000+08:00

Haiz.. I feel so heartbroken. I feel the emptiness inside me. I've failed. I've failed to win her even though I gave her everything. What shall I do? Haiz.. I'm in the middle of a crossroad of nowhere. A place so deserted and isolated. I know I can never win her heart no matter what I do or say. Maybe, she's not mine. She belong to someone else. This paper heart have been torn into little bits. Until it could no longer be simplified anymore. What I want now is just to fall in love for someone. Someone who can be a source of inspiration for me. My life have been so gloomy.. haix. todae i went to school. Met new teachers(heven't taught me b4) mrs lim and mr chan and mr pah. It was ok. It's like last year but different people and can have better interaction since two tables attached. Well got to bring newspaper and pencil case. Ate pizza juz now. Song's treat for the Ns. pity Ian though.. had to repeat for another year because of stress. Went to band and the band sux like hell. It's becoming worse than of that that i used to noe.. HAizzz..

Realization

2004-12-24T12:53:00.000+08:00

I realised that everything happens for a reason. If you cannot get something, that mean you are assigned to another task.

Pain in the arse.

2004-12-21T10:35:00.000+08:00

After riding to East Coast yesterday, my butt hurts. It was okay.

:(

2004-12-18T19:00:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling so sad. I feel lost. Y am I so useless? I cant sleep tonite. The moment I hug my pillow, I wud think of her. Haiz.. I love her.

:)

2004-12-18T16:13:00.000+08:00

It's confirmed that i don't stand a shot. Haiz. So foolish of me. I trusted her too much. STUPIDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Both the results were released. Major setback for me. Idiot me.. Now I stand a shot on my 'o's and i can spend my money on myself. Shalihin2.. Kenapa kau bodoh sangat ar? Siapa nak kau? Pape. Tak handsome pulak tu. Bodoh. HAHAHA. Diam lar setan!! Bodoh!! Buang duit!! Buang masa!! Amik kau akibatnyer. HAHAHA.

Afresh

2004-12-18T13:27:00.000+08:00

Well. I dunno why but I feel so much better after sleeping. It seems like I've forgotten her already. Though feeling a bit sad. Missing. Maybe becuased I drained everything yestersay. Khekhekhe. Now, Im going to excercize everyday and study hard. There are so much girls in the world. WHy must I see only one right. It's not like I'm married. But I really tresure those moments with her. If she had not gone to work, I think this wouldn't happen. Now, she's too complacent about her looks because some guys were attracted to her. Hehe. How long can it last. As patient as i can be. I think it's gonna be quite tough looking for one like that. I think I want to polythecnics. Why? Can't decide. I will expand my circle of friends. Though, I will not forget about my 2 close friends. Though she's the only one for me for now. i think there's more to come. Maybe Allah thought that I was too good for her. Haha. Kidding. In actual fact. I don't know how to mmake her happy. Because she sees money and good-looking guys. Well, if that what she wants, I can't wrong her right. Afterall, siapalah aku. I'm going to strive and beat the rest. Like what Asriman said. Revenge in disguise. Haha

dissapointment

2004-12-18T08:40:00.000+08:00

Today is the release of 'N' level result. My head is spinning while im entering this. Today is a big dissapointment for me. I got a 6 instead of 4 I dreamt of. She did not look at me. I'm neither happy nor sad nor nervous while waiting for the result. All I wanted was to see her. Without her, I feel so empty like what I'm feeling right now. I miss her so. Deep inside me, there's a calling which asked me to let her go. From my observation, she can live without me. I'm the problems that she once shared with me would soon reside. My heart is slashed. How I wished we were like last time. At work, I think there's quite a number of guys who tried to woo her including her colleagues. I stand only 10% chance of hope of winning. But I'm willing to try even with that little hope. I hope she would soon realise how sincere i feel towards her. The weather now is about to rain. Juz like what I'm feeling now. I'll try to ease my mind.

Afresh.

2004-12-18T05:44:00.000+08:00

I wrote long2 already but accidentally erased. Sianz. I drained all my tears and I filled much happier now. But still, I quite miss her. There's still this after effect of the broken heart. It have been wounded quite bad. I juz want her to be happy. By not being with me would, I don't mind so long as her happiness is concerned. I don't mind forsaking my happiness for hers. I hope she don't have other ulterior motive as for her decision. I will find the one one day. I found it but lost it. She'll always be the one in my heart. But I would have to make a strong front denying what I actually feel inside. I guess that is life huh?? Nothing last forever and that life is kust a loan. I believed that I'm destined for more than ehat I expected. Maybe this happens because Allah wants me not to do those sins. Yar.. And that with this break up. I would really realise that how a break up of rejection could cause someone to be bonkerzz. Hahakz. I know I've made a lot of mistakes in life. But some I don't even realise. To me not knowing is the gretest failure. But ignorance is also a blessing in disguise because you won't worry so much. At the same time, you feel you are in the dark and would feel left out. I neither rich nor good-looking. I don't know if I would ever have the courage to ask a girl out anymore. I feel so afraid. Afraid of the reoccurrance. But to think about it. My palz also don't have girlfriendz. That would make us even again now. Singles. I don't have to waste my money on her anymore. I can now buy a bag I desire for so long. There are many girls. In fact more female than male. Hmm.. I'll find the one who loves me and I love her in return one day. I will make sure that nothing will break us up no matter the outcome. For now, I got to concentrete on my 'o' levels. Busy busy is what I got to say. So, I'll start working hard now. Luckily I'm not working. I have the free time for my own activites. I will rule the world.. Hahakz. Nah, just want my life to be fulfiled. Have a good family. A suppportive and loving one. Have good friends. Have a good house. I don't favour bunglow anymore. What is the need to have to. now that she's gone. i think otherwise. Our aspirations coincide too much. That is why we did not work out.

Welcum 2 My Life

2004-12-15T15:23:00.000+08:00

Welcum 2 My Life

notice

2004-12-14T17:01:00.000+08:00

Hmm. I noticed something about the world today. Something indescribable. I realised my life. I realised that it is dead. That have got to go man. I muz find a way. A real dream to move on. I hate this body im in now. I got to work it really hard. I must wonder what it is going to be like in the next five years of my life. I can be the most dissapointed guy ever or the most fulfilled one. I must not be dissapointed. I got to do something. I will kick all my bad habits. Yeah!! I will RocK the world. PEace. AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! Feel like shouting and burst the power of the real me and potray it. Tt's all.

pathetic me

2004-12-06T15:35:00.000+08:00

todae i went for kompang to make some money and got 15 bucks. I messaged her todae. From her messages, i knew that she was no longer interested in me. I've always failed. Maybe, we were not meant to be together after all. I've alwaes imagine her to be my bride. She used to be there for me. So thoughtful. So .... it's indescribable. i miss those days. Im always thinking. Thinking and wondering of people's thoughts and try to anticipate their moves. What for? No idea. I feel lost living here. I feel the solitude. I dun noe why but she really plays a very deep impact on me. I'll try very hard to get whatever she wants. She's never satisfied. I'm hopeless like she said to me. I know that she's got no confident at all from the beginning about us. She alwaes said " I love u as long as I can " (something like that) Tt's the cause. She did not have trust in me. I need someone to share to. haix.. I hope tt tt someone would appear. i'll be waiting

something

2004-11-22T01:26:00.000+08:00

I've had a dream ofher today. It was wonderful. I dreamt that we were on the bus together. We had a good chat. Like the old times. I really miss her so much. When I woke up, I realised that it was noto real. How I wish that I won't wake so that the dream won't go away.

Haix

2004-11-20T15:17:00.000+08:00

Todae, my family thought that my grandmother had went missing.

18/11/04

2004-11-19T07:14:00.000+08:00

Todae I went to band wif Ismadi taking the bike. Hmm.. I hate my bike because the seat is just too hard for me. It was a pain in the arse. In band, I fixed my horn but it is still stucky. She did not come today. I wonder what have happened.. I hope she's fine. That is all.

17/11/2004

2004-11-18T08:19:00.000+08:00

Today should have been our 1yr and 2 mths together.. Well, today I went to band. Well, it was okay actually. I suddenly miss playing in the band today. I've not been playing for around 3-4 months. When in the middle of the session, I found it quite boring but I moved on. Later, after band, Faris ,Hafiz and me went to KFC. Eat2 and gain mass. After that I went home and the both of them gone for a game of soccer with Ismadi. I saw her using the bangle I gave her. It kinda give me mix emotions. Well, that's about all. I still don't know how the tag board work... The site is down. Help me!! thx in advance.

2004-11-16T10:19:00.000+08:00

Me, Marcus and William Hung

First time

2004-11-16T10:06:00.000+08:00

This is my first time writing. Well, I started this for my future business purpose. Hehe. Well, I kind of feel in solitude right now. Although it's been two months already. I miss her so. I guess rejection is part of life. I'll be taking my 'o's next year. I really regretted having done so bad in my PSLE. If not, my life would have changed. N Hari Raya for me is so bad. I got $4o onli for the past 2 days. I wonder if I would be able to collect to the total of $120 to clear my hp debts. Blame it oon myself for wanting so much to own a hp. Haix. My line is going to terminate in Dec. I was thinking of buying a prepaid card instead. That's all. ARioS fellOw BLogGerS n ReAdeRs.